Near-Death Experiencer Shares Secrets from Beyond the Veil

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Search “Diane Goble” in your device’s ebook store or Google “ebooks by Diane Goble”

or read a sample and purchase directly from publisher (click on title below)

Watch for a New Smashwords Discount Coupon every month

Reincarnation and the Evolution of Consciousness (2013) – 16,000 words – $1.99

Author reading Chapter “The Challenge of Being Fully Human

Author on BlogTalkRadio with Pamela Edmunds’ Bridge Between Two Worlds – 2/12/14

Author on BlogTalkRadio with Pamela Cummins’ The Love Channel Show – 4/15/14

The Path to Peace & Joy (2013) – 15,290 words – $1.99

Author reading Chapter “Chakras

How to Die Consciously: Secrets from Beyond the Veil (2011) – 52,520 words – $2.99

Author reading Chapter “End of Life Conversations

Conversations with a Near-Death Experiencer – Book 1 (2010) – 95,840 words – $3.99

*** MARCH SPECIAL “50% Off” – Use code FJ47W at check out ***

More Conversations with a Near-Death Experiencer – Book 2 (2010) – 70,340 words – $2.99

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Sitting in the Lotus Blossom (2010) – 64,100 words – $2.99

Author reading Chapter “The Wounded Planet

• • • • • • •

The following CDs are suggested in some of Diane’s ebooks

Vocals by Diane Goble • Music by Shapeshifter

Sample and downloads available by clicking on links below

happinessCDHappiness Journey (download) – $1.99

lotusmeditationLotus Meditation (download) – $1.99

Relax1-4Relax2-4Relaxation Exercise 1 & 2 (downloads) – $3.99

ClearingPastCDClearing the Past (download) – $1.99


Physician-assisted suicide addressed in new book by Near-Death Experiencer

Beyond the Veil

Our Journey Home

by Diane Goble

We’re all going to die some day so–

  • shouldn’t we all be looking into this event instead of living in denial and pretending it only happens to other people?

  • shouldn’t we at least have some tools available to us so when it does, however it does, we’re prepared and know what to do next?

  • shouldn’t we prepare ourselves to take care of and comfort a loved one who is terribly ill or elderly and facing their own death?

That’s what I thought when I first began writing this book, which is what I was asked to do when I decided to come back into my body during my near-death experience while drowning during a white water river rafting accident in 1971.

Voilà!

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 The answers to all those questions you have about death, dying and what comes next are between these covers.

The paperback, published by Cosmic Creativity, is now available on amazon.com and at most major book retailers.

Posting reviews or sharing your thoughts about Beyond the Veil on retailer websites, like amazon.com, may contribute to the evolution of human consciousness and are much appreciated by all those who contributed to the publication of this valuable book.


… a way for individuals to consciously prepare for what’s to come, and to better understand the life in their death, and what happens next. Anyone can benefit from this book, so keep it handy. You may use it more often than you think.

~ P.M.H. Atwater, L.H.D., researcher and author of Near-Death Experiences: The Rest of the Story and We Live Forever: The Real Truth About Death

There is no easy way to bring up the conversation of death but Goble’s book shows us why this is one of the most important discussions that we can have.

~ Josie Varga, author of Visits from Heaven and Visits to Heaven

Ultimately learning how to be fully present and conscious for the one who is passing is one of the greatest gifts you can offer someone you love.

~ JoAnn Chambers, Vibrational Sound Healer and co-author of The Sonic Keys: Sound, Light & Frequency; DNA Activation, and The Secret of Abundance


This is a conversation you must have with yourself…

and probably should have with all family members–

not that you need to have all the answers right now, but just to get you started thinking about these important questions before it’s necessary to know the answers so there won’t be any family disagreements in the heat of a crisis. We all need to have these conversations about the end of our lives and what we do want and don’t want as far as treatment options, including invasive procedures, aggressive therapies, prescription drugs, palliative care, hospice,  and when and where we choose to die, depending on the circumstances and based on our own values, traditions and beliefs. Ideally we need to review our choices every 5 years as we get older, if we have health changes, lifestyle changes, because we often make different decisions as our age and circumstances change. We need to think about situations like–

If your heart stopped right now, what is your family’s plan?

Does anyone know where your important papers, passwords, contacts, valuables are kept and what you want done with them and who to contact after you’re gone?

If your persistent headaches led to a diagnosis of an inoperable brain tumor and a diagnosis of 6 months or less to live, would you consider the Death with Dignity option (do you know if it’s available in your state/country, what the requirements are)?

Are you aware that your Emergency Contact is not necessarily your Healthcare Representative unless that person is also designated in your Advance Healthcare Directive/Living Will?

If your spouse had a sudden illness requiring hospitalization, what things would you have to do that you wouldn’t ordinarily do? What if the person had been in an accident and was in a coma?

Do you really know what it means if you say do everything to save me?

Knowing that at some point you will die, how do you hope your death will be? Have you told anyone? Have you contemplated your own death?

Have you considered how you would manage becoming a full-time caregiver for a severely ill child or an elderly parent?

If you are entering your dying process, have you reconciled your life and found peace of mind or do you fear what lies ahead?


Beyond the Veil: Our Journey Home

was written by Diane Goble, a near-death experiencer who became a spiritual teacher, based on what she learned during her journey home and was asked to bring back to share with as many people as she could.
Her primary message is– We Don’t Die!
Her book is a resource manual, chock full of information about the options that are available to us as we are preparing ourselves for transition or being a caregiver for someone who is in the dying process.
It is a training manual based on the author’s professional course to teach caregivers to be Transition Guides for their dying loved ones or patients.
It is a personal workbook with plenty of Notes pages for those soon departing as they are guided through the practice of the Art of Conscious Dying and writing their own Personal Transition Guidebook.
It is printed in large type.

For those of you who need more, go to BeyondtheVeil.net. Diane will be offering classes and webinars with special guests, and private consultations about end-of-life issues and conversations in the near future. If you would like to receive updates, fill out the following form:

“Beyond the Veil: Our Journey Home” by Diane Goble – to be released 1/1/15

9780963860651-Perfect.indd

Beyond the Veil: Our Journey Home

by

Diane Goble

Release Date: January 1, 2015

… a way for individuals to consciously prepare for what’s to come, and to better understand the life in their death, and what happens next. Anyone can benefit from this book, so keep it handy. You may use it more often than you think.

~ P.M.H. Atwater, L.H.D., researcher and author of Near-Death Experiences: The Rest of the Story and We Live Forever: The Real Truth About Death

There is no easy way to bring up the conversation of death but Goble’s book shows us why this is one of the most important discussions that we can have.

~ Josie Varga, author of Visits from Heaven and Visits to Heaven

Ultimately learning how to be fully present and conscious for the one who is passing is one of the greatest gifts you can offer someone you love.

~ JoAnn Chambers, Vibrational Sound Healer and co-author of The Sonic Keys: Sound, Light & Frequency; DNA Activation, and The Secret of Abundance


This is a conversation you must have with yourself and probably should have with all family members–

not that you need to have all the answers right now, but just to get you started thinking about these important questions before it’s necessary to know the answers so there won’t be any arguments in the heat of the moment. We all need to have these conversations about the end of our lives and what we do want and don’t want as far as treatment options, palliative care, hospice care and when and where we choose to die, depending on the circumstances and based on our own values, traditions and beliefs. Ideally we need to reconsider our choices every 5 years as we get older, if we have health changes, lifestyle changes, because we often make different decisions as our age and circumstances change.

If your heart stopped right now, what is your family’s plan?

Does anyone know where your important papers, passwords, contacts, valuables are kept and what you want done with them and who to contact after you’re gone?

If your persistent headaches led to a diagnosis of an inoperable brain tumor and a diagnosis of 6 months or less to live, would you consider the Death with Dignity option (do you know if it’s available in your state/country, what the requirements are)?

Are you aware that your Emergency Contact is not necessarily your Healthcare Representative unless that person is also designated in your Advance Healthcare Directive/Living Will?

If your spouse had a sudden illness requiring hospitalization, what things would you have to do that you wouldn’t ordinarily do? What if the person had been in an accident and was in a coma?

Knowing that at some point you will die, how do you hope your death will be? Have you told anyone? Have you contemplated your own death?

Have you considered how you would manage becoming a full-time caregiver for a severely ill child or an elderly parent?

If you are entering your dying process, have you reconciled your life and found peace of mind or do you fear what lies ahead?


Beyond the Veil: Our Journey Home was written by Diane Goble, a near-death experiencer, based on what she learned during her journey home and was asked to bring back to share with as many people as she could. Her primary message is that We Don’t Die! Her book is a resource manual, chock full of information about the options that are available to us as we are dying or being a caregiver for someone who is in the dying process. It is a training manual to teach caregivers to be Transition Guides for their dying loved ones or patients. It is a personal workbook with plenty of Notes pages for those who are dying as they are guided through the practice of the Art of Conscious Dying and writing their own Personal Transition Guidebook. It is in large print to make it easier to read.


 

Film can start “The Conversation” about end-of-life

I wrote this column which was published in my local newspaper, The Nugget on 12/10/2014, after viewing the beautiful, award-winning documentary “Final Pose,” about a local yoga teacher who developed cancer and in the end decided to use Oregon’s Death with Dignity Act.

I attended the screening of “Final Pose,” an award-winning BendFilm 2014 documentary directed by Karen Mellberg of Bend at The Belfry last week. The film concerns the end-of-life journey of Sisters yogi Myra Lani Fisher through her own voice and was filmed during the last few weeks of her life as she was preparing to use Oregon’s Death with Dignity (DWD) Act.

I didn’t know Myra and only learned about her a few weeks before she transitioned. I wish I could have had a conversation with this very strong woman to learn how she processed her decision to choose this end of life option. Because this is what I do– help people have these conversations about death and dying so they can make informed choices, have discussions among their family members, and fill out the necessary paperwork so their last wishes will be carried out. It probably wouldn’t surprise you that most people find it difficult to even contemplate their own death, much less plan for it.

I spoke with a number of people that night who had no idea this information was available or even that Oregon has had a DWD law since 1997. Very few have talked to their doctor about anything to do with their own death and not many knew about the process one has to go through to request the option. This can be a daunting task for anyone, especially for those who wait until the last possible minute to even try to find information. Just having to make the request twice 15 days apart, much less trying to find a physician who will write a prescription and a pharmacist who will fill it, can take time and perseverance– this where CompassionandChoices.org can help.

It’s certainly not a fit for everybody as one’s dying process isn’t always a terrible ordeal, but for some people, it is… with some diseases, especially certain cancers such as Lani suffered with, it can be excruciatingly painful in spite of the availability of morphine through hospice services. Certainly palliative pain management is helpful for a lot of people, but it’s not universally available, not everybody benefits equally and an individual’s suffering is intangible.

For those who die slowly over a long period of time, especially in their 80s and 90s, continuing to be kept alive only to continue suffering even without pain can be unbearable to some and these patients often beg to die, beg their loved ones to kill them; some take matters into their own hands.

Voluntary Stop Eating and Drinking (VSED) is often the only sanctioned option a person has if they are not terminal (diagnosed with 6 months or less to live), have a degenerative disease or mental problem or are frail elderly. I’ve seen VSED go well for some people and others not so much. We don’t have a perfect system for helping people to die well yet. Medical students are finally starting to receive some training in end of life care and things are slowly beginning to change. Insurance coverage is a whole other issue.

Those who end up in hospitals trying one more resuscitation, one more invasive procedure, one more experimental treatment, often end up on life support beyond what they would have wanted– just because they were too afraid to have the conversation and make some informed decisions about what treatments they would want and not want at the end of their lives. This agony extends to the family and leaves them traumatized for years over whether they did the right thing because they always thought there would be more time and suddenly there is none.

Yes, there are religious objections, and fears of wantonly offing the disabled, the elderly, the vulnerable who are unable to speak for themselves, which is why we need solid laws to prevent coercion and forced extermination. Seventeen years of experience has shown the Oregon DWD Act to be effective and only used by a small percentage of people. And only a small percentage of the people who request their prescription actually fill it, and an even smaller percentage actually end up taking it.

The recent case of Brittany Maynard, a 29-year old woman with incurable brain cancer, a prognosis of a only a few months to live, and the likelihood of an agonizing dying process, has kickstarted the conversation around the country about our right to choose to die on our own terms. She moved to Oregon from California where there is no legal option for aid-in-dying and ended her life last month with the help of Compassion & Choices by self-administering the medication on the day she chose at home in her own bed with her husband and her mother by her side. Isn’t this the way we all want to go?

So now we have this beautiful documentary, a gift from Myra Lani Fisher and Karen Mellberg, about the beauty of life in our own death to give each of us the courage to have those hard conversations we don’t want to have with ourselves or with our families, but which we must… because suddenly there may be no more time.

The boundaries that divide Life and Death are at best shadowy and vague.

Who shall say where the one ends and where the other begins?

~Edgar Allen Poe

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Death with Dignity laws

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The recent death of a 29-year old woman who chose to use the Death with Dignity law in Oregon has invigorated the debate about our right to make choices about our healthcare at the end of our life. Brittany Maynard had a brain tumor that doctors said would end her life in a most undignified manner and she chose not to experience that part of her illness. She completed her Bucket List and enjoyed the last quality time she could with her husband and parents, and died peacefully at the time of her choosing at home in her own bed surrounded by those who loved her.

If you are facing such a decision, whether you are thinking about the Death with Dignity option or not, this book by a Near-Death Experiencer, will help you find acceptance and peace of mind as you navigate medical decisions, care options including palliative and hospice services, conversations with family and providers, filling out Advance Healthcare Directives and making decisions about how your want to die.

Beyond the Veil is for caregivers who will be transition guides for their loved ones, for families to help them have the necessary conversations, and for the dying person who wants desperately to know what is happening to them along their journey home.

Excerpt from Beyond the Veil: our journey home by Diane Goble about Death with Dignity laws:

Reasonable laws can prevent abuse while honoring self-respect, human dignity and compassion. Just as an obstetrician might administer a drug to hasten a birth, a doctor may prescribe a drug that will hasten not death but the rebirth of our spiritual nature. Prepared ahead of time and guided by a transition guide’s voice reading one’s Personal Transition Guidebook, it is a peaceful journey home beyond the veil.

Some people believe it is a slippery slope to allow this at all. They are afraid mentally or physically disabled or senile elderly people will be murdered for convenience. Perhaps in some societies where human life isn’t valued that could be true. It is up to those who believe in death with dignity to make sure laws are in place to prevent forced euthanasia by designating medical professionals and safe procedures to provide humane, compassionate assistance to those who decide of their own free will to exercise this option.

A May 2005 Galllup Poll indicated that 75% of Americans support “euthanasia” for certain patients but only 58% support “doctor-assisted suicide” for the same patients. Use of the term “suicide” was the only difference in the question asked. The Gallup Poll conclusion was that the use of the word caused the apparent conflict in values.

Opponents count on the negative emotional impact of the term. Calling it “suicide” or “murder” conjures up images that clash with religious beliefs and humanitarian values, but have nothing to do with personal choice at the end of life.

This is what Dr. Jack Kervorkian fought for–a patient’s right to choose and the physician’s role at end of life. It’s nobody’s business except the person who is dying, his physician and his family members (and sometimes not the latter). It’s continuing care through the end of life.

Instead of physicians abandoning their patients at the end of their invasive medical treatment options, they could stay with them to provide the medication that will quickly end their suffering if that is their patient’s final request.

Their Hippocratic oath says, firstly, do no harm, but if forcing a person to stay alive while their body  progressively deteriorates for years, whether physically or mentally, isn’t doing harm, I don’t know what is. Seems to me physicians need a better understanding of compassion. Continuing to swear an oath to Greek gods is out of touch with contemporary reality–the earth is not flat and doctors are not gods.

Having “The Conversation” about End of Life Healthcare Planning

The Nugget, Sisters, Oregon – October 15, 2014

Having “The Conversation”

By Diane Goble

Ever since Ben Franklin warned us, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail,” we’ve been diligently planning for everything — college, career path, marriage, children, home buying, vacations, retirement — everything, that is except our inevitable end of life. We don’t want to think about that so we tend to ignore it or postpone dealing with it, often until it’s too late. We live in the state of denial that keeps us oblivious to the unthinkable fact that this day could be our last on earth.

Hopefully that’s not true for you this day, but statistically, in this country, 1 person dies every 3 seconds, approximately 6800 of us every day, 2,468,435 every year. Most people die from health-related conditions, including (in order) heart disease, cancer, chronic respiratory diseases (COPD) and stroke. Accidents are next down the list. All of these are, to some degree, preventable, treatable, manageable, mitigated by medical care and healthy lifestyle changes, and most of us will survive to live the life we planned to a ripe old age.

And that’s part of the problem. Health care has improved, we’re making progress with many cancers, we’ve recognized the problem of obesity and we’re eating healthier and exercising more so we’re living longer but we’re getting diseases now that people didn’t use to get because they died at earlier ages — Alzheimer’s Disease, in particular, but also emphysema, COPD, Parkinson’s Disease, and diabetes. And with the aging Boomer population, we wonder will there be rationing of medical services.

The health care system has us focused on treatments that almost kill us in order to make us better so we can live longer and get more diseases for them to treat. At the same time there are more people in need of care, there are also fewer doctors and medical services are stretched thin.

And within this maelstrom of activity is the elephant in the room. At some point, we are all going to die — but no one wants to admit it or talk about it and certainly know one wants to plan for it. We always think there will be more time.

This is a quote from this correspondent’s soon to be released book on amazon.com, Beyond the Veil: Our Journey Home, from a woman named Kathy who shared her experience of not planning ahead:

While we had gradually acknowledged to each other that he might not make it, we’d never really accepted it or talked about what it meant. I always thought we’d have a period of time when he was in hospice care when we would talk more and say our goodbyes. While I, and my kids, said lots of goodbyes and I love yous while he was in a coma, he was never able to communicate with us again. I still replay those last few days over and over and wonder how we didn’t know he was so close to the end and wonder if he knew.

There is a lesson in this: to say the things we want to say while we can – and it illustrates why it is so important to plan for the end of our lives, not just for our selves, but for our loved ones as well. We won’t know how we are going to die, where we will be when it happens, who will be with us or if we will be alone, but we can make our choices known about how we want to be treated at that crucial time, which will guide our loved ones to follow our wishes.

We do have some options and they are more likely to be honored if we have discussed them with our family members and doctors, appointed a healthcare representative who supports our wishes through our Advance Healthcare Directive so physicians will know what we want and don’t want if it comes down to that. The biggest hurdle is sitting down to have the conversation.

Realize that this is not a one-time conversation. It may occur in bits and pieces — a question at the dinner table, a comment during a TV program or news story, a shared article from a magazine, a book, a website, a post on Facebook. Over time and with new information or health concerns, you may change your mind several times.

You may have a conversation with your doctor or a clergy member that provides some new insight or clarifies your values. After seeing what another family went through, you may decide you do or don’t want that to happen to you. Visiting a friend in hospice care may change you mind about how soon you would want to bring hospice services into your life or the life of a family member. Advance Healthcare Directives are changeable and should be reviewed every 5 years or as you health changes.

No matter how old you are — and perhaps this is something everyone should do when they first get their driver’s license because those are extremely vulnerable years for accidents — no matter what your health status is, the time to have these important conversations is when you are healthy and mentally competent to make decisions. By the time you are in an ambulance, in the ER, or on your deathbed, it is too late. Leaving it to your distraught family members to decide what you would want during dire circumstances is setting them up for unending grief and trauma over whether they did they right thing — no matter what they did or didn’t do.

Fortunately, right here in Sisters, there are several people, including Kelsey Collins, Sue Stafford, myself and others, who are available to help people sort through the information about Medicare, home health care, palliative care, hospice services, Advance Healthcare Directives, POLST and Oregon’s Death with Dignity Act. Talk to your doctor, talk to your spiritual adviser and by all means, talk with your family about your last wishes — then you don’t have to think about it anymore!

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A Peaceful Death with Dignity

I’d like to express my appreciation to Brittany Maynard for going public with her decision to exercise her Death with Dignity option in Oregon because it will bring this conversation to the family dinner table where it belongs. Of course I’m sad she has this terrible condition, but if she can make something positive out of a bad situation, which she is by raising awareness, it gives hope to many people who want the same thing– if my death is inevitable, let it be peaceful and on my own terms.

This is what I encourage people to do on a daily basis through my writings and “Having The Conversation over Coffee and Cake” gatherings. I don’t encourage Death with Dignity, but I’m not afraid to address it as an option and provide resources, such as Compassion & Choices, if people want to consider it. This is a truly personal decision that should be between a terminally ill patient and those in his or her inner circle and it’s a shame the Maynard family has to be exposed to the vitriol that permeates Internet over their personal decision to allow Brittany to have a peaceful death with dignity. It’s as if  everybody suddenly noticed there’s an elephant in the room.

Those among us who think we have a right to an opinion about how any person decides he or she wants his/her death to be should be thinking about how they want the end of their lives to be, not someone they don’t even know. If, for whatever reason you think, having control over one’s own death at the end of life, is wrong then do it your way, whatever that is – and let me do it my way. Don’t force your views on me because you think you have all the right answers and I won’t interfere with your decisions about how you choose to experience your last days. And I’m referring here to people who have been given 6 months or less to survive a terminal illness, are in intractable pain or unbearable agony or suffering, and choose not to prolong their life.

That choice is still limited by the ability to self-administer the medication and therein lies the crux of the problem. If the person waits too long and loses decision-making abilities, or there is a sudden change in health that precludes swallowing or self-administering the medication, or if the person makes the request too late for all the paperwork to be completed, there are complications. This is where the law comes in. We can’t have people recklessly giving vulnerable people life-ending medications, or physicians or insurance companies or the government deciding when life no longer has value.

The law that was passed in Oregon takes into account the legal aspects of the issue to the extent that we can protect the vulnerable and protect physicians, hospice workers, pharmacists and families, from prosecution for helping a dying person carry out their wishes for a peaceful ending to their physical existence. This law has stood the test of time with no slippery slope or mass extinction for 17 years and is the basis for the laws passed in Washington, Vermont, and pending a vote in several other states.

Studies among physicians reveal a majority of physicians would refuse treatment and consider Death with Dignity for themselves, but they would suggest continuing treatments to their patients. They have the hypocrisy to claim that an oath written 2500 years ago by people who believed the earth was flat, and gods and goddesses ruled over humanity, told them to do no harm and give no poison. What really is the harm if the person is dying and is in considerable pain?

Which leads us to consider religious views that claim God said this or that, or a Jesus or a Mohammed said this or that, and believe that their holy book or their dogma is the one and only truth – and that it applies to the rest of us. And many people don’t believe… that there is even a God or a Jesus or a Mohammed to have a say so in the matter. Then we have many ethical atheists who think we only have one life and have no right to end it on our own terms.

We live in a world where millions of people die every day, often sick, hungry, dehydrated, neglected or savagely beaten, enslaved, decapitated, electrocuted, eviscerated, drowned, bombed, burned alive, as if they were meaningless cockroaches. But suddenly we become concerned and know what’s best for some poor person who has been suffering terribly with some dreadful disease or condition, and only asks for a peaceful death with dignity in the privacy of their own bedrooms, surrounded by their loved ones.

I hope Brittany Maynard’s plight will be an awakening to all you who have doubts about what is the right thing to for you in a situation like she is facing and begin to see that death is a sacred journey into whatever comes next. We will all go through it, we need to recognize that it is a graduation, not the end of our journey.

The message from my near-death experience is that We Don’t Die! Death of the body is not the end of life – life goes on and there is so much more to look forward to beyond the veil of illusion.

Peace & Joy!

Diane

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Planning Your Assisted-Suicide

I live in Oregon so I can legally request the

Death With Dignity option

at the time I deem appropriate if I choose, so I’ve thought about what medical treatments and interventions I would or wouldn’t accept and how I would want to die if this or that happens to my body and/or mind, whenever it happens.

I’ve been involved with this issue long enough (see article)– I was a hospice volunteer off and on for over 20 years, I’ve sat with numerous people and their families as they lay dying, I’ve been a caregiver and a counselor to the dying, I had a near-death experience 40 years ago (see article)– and I understand more about death and dying than most people who try not to think about it at all.

Most folks have opinions related to self-preservation, love of family and their life, or religious dogma, but a narrow perspective of the whole issue. So I’m just going to think out loud here to give others some food for thought… with the caveat that you continue this conversation with someone immediately after reading this and get to work on your own Advanced Healthcare Directive.

I’m 70+ so there’s that. Having seen first hand and studied what happens to the body and the mind of the majority of people as they age, I acknowledge my personal limits. Knowing my body and what I’ve done to it and for it, I’m hoping to live healthy to at least 75 but no longer than 80. Closer to 75, more likely. Beyond 80 things seem to fall apart more rapidly and sitting in front of a TV all day in an assisted living home with a bunch of other half comatose people is not something I could take for more than a minute. Lying in a  hospital bed staring at the ceiling with no hope of ever getting up again would be intolerable.

Now I know there are some 90-year olds still driving and playing golf or milking the cows and tilling the fields,  but that’s not me. There are also some 60-year old, overweight couch potatoes, who can hardly walk from the couch to the refrigerator any more.They’re on multiple medications with multiple side effects and are mostly miserable most of the time.

One’s past habits and lifestyle have a lot to say about how fit we will be in our old age, and we should be aware of our genes and our base lines so we can keep track of our physical health as we age. If you’re 40 and have diabetes, you’re not likely to make it to experience much of old age. If you haven’t cared about your health during your life, you’re not likely to have a healthy older age.

Of course one can always get hit by a bus or have a heart attack or get shot by a wacko on his own suicide mission. Personally if I’m too far gone and it would take too much or too long to restore me to a reasonable state of health, I would opt not to be resuscitated in the first place.

Certainly cracking open my rib cage, cutting off any limbs or hooking my body up to artificial life support are completely off the table. I want not to live without full use of my limbs or cognitive processes so don’t even think about it. If my heart stops, let me be. If I come back on my own, this time, I’ll talk about it. If my mind starts to disappear, you can bet I’ll be working on my suicide plan, physician-assisted or not, before I forget who my loved ones are.

So you have this pain or these symptoms you’ve been ignoring but it’s suddenly gotten worse and you can’t do things you used to be able to do so you finally go to a doctor and they run a bunch of tests and tell you that you have cancer of the blahblah and they’re going to have to take out your blahblah and then you’ll have to have radiation and chemo and then maybe you’ll have a few good months left but every case is different and they just know you’re going to beat this so here, sign these papers and let’s get started.

And you go… WTF? Because you never thought about it before, never allowed yourself to think it might happen to you or someone you love. You didn’t hear a word the doctor said after “cancer.” Your mind went blank and you felt like the elevator just dropped 20 floors in a second.

You are now spinning out of control but your doctor has moved on to the next patient to give him or her the same devastating news and you’re left to gather your wits and find your way home to tell your loved ones… but the only word that comes out of your mouth is… cancer or brain tumor or kidney failure or multiple sclerosis. Suddenly you’re a dead man walking.

You’ve never thought about it before? Never asked anyone what their thoughts are? Never asked someone who is dying what they think about? Would you want everything done? Do you even know what “everything” means? How much of you abilities are you wiling to do without just to see the next football game on TV?

You suddenly black out and wake up hooked up to machines in an ICU, paralyzed so you don’t try to rip out the tubes and  lines, surrounded by strangers with masks on looking down at you and one of them says sprightly, “Welcome back, Mr. Jones. We thought we’d lost you.”

And you’re thinking, “OMG, I was having this wonderful out-of-body experience. I was surrounded by loving beings of light and you brought me back to this? I’ll kill everyone of you!” But you can’t speak, you can’t move. Those people out there think you’re not aware, but you’re aware of everything, you just can’t do anything about it.

You’re wishing you had written that Advanced Healthcare Directive indicating you wanted no extraordinary measures to keep you alive if you were in this unfathomable condition. Unless you have a few lucid moments to state otherwise or can at least blink your eyes if asked, it is now beyond your control. You could end up a living, breathing vegetable for years.

If one is born disabled or becomes disabled through accident or illness, there is a whole added dimension to thoughts about one’s death. Depending on how dependent you are on others for care and whether you are able to communicate or are even aware of what’s happening, decisions are difficult, riddled with guilt and fear, no one ever sure they did the right thing. If you could convey your wishes, what would they be?

Assisted dying is not an option under the current laws unless you can self-administer. It has been tested by brave people with ALS and MS in the U.S. and foreign courts but euthanasia, which allows a physician to administer a life-ending drug to a person who is unable to self-administer because of their disability, is considered murder and many people fear that is opening assisted dying up to a slippery slope that could lead to the wholesale killing of the most vulnerable among us– the elderly, the disabled, the mentally ill, the poor.

Instead of showing compassion for those who are wrestling with these very personal decisions, some groups of religious protestors and bio-ethicists use fear and scare tactics, dredging up images from the Holocaust and other genocides, or hellfire and eternal damnation, to keep everyone from having control of how they end their own lives. These moral absolutists feel they are right and everyone else is wrong, and they have to protect us wayward relativists from ourselves as if we had no values. We do, just not the same as theirs.

I value human life as part of our eternal spiritual journey, I just don’t believe in the sanctity of life as the right to lifers do. Theirs is a religion based on fear and a judgmental god. I believe our Free Will gives us the right to determine when the quality of our life has fallen below our level of tolerance; that we should have the right to decide when it’s our time to die, and be able to ask our doctor to help us by giving us a prescription that will allow us to chose the time and circumstances of our own death.

Physicians, pharmacists and hospitals who provide a public benefit to a diverse society cannot impose their personal religious beliefs or moral values on patients at the end of their lives any more than at any other time in their lives. They work for us, we hire them… they are not the boss of us!

The alternative, if one is able, may be to blow your brains out or jump off a bridge or throw yourself in front of a train. What a mess! How much more peaceful and spiritual to take a pill and just go to sleep. Would you rather your family watch you suffer or allow you to die in peace? How much better for your family to be by your side instead of you having to go off like an animal to die alone.

A good way to count oneself down is to make a list of 100 things you do every day and cross items off as you can’t do them anymore until you’re down to the last 5 or 10 or 20, wherever you draw the line, then call your doctor for your prescription, pick it up when you are ready, gather your family together to say your goodbyes and have a final toast to your good death and peaceful journey home.

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How do you make end of life healthcare decisions?

Of a certain age…

by Diane Goble, Columnist, The Nugget News, April 16, 2014

My best friend just had her second mastectomy last week. In the last two years, she’s had her gall bladder removed, a lumpectomy, a mastectomy and now this one. She says the good news is that she’s lost 20 pounds and can see her toes again!

She has several messages on her cell phone asking her to call another oncologist for follow- up. She’s procrastinating. “It’s not in my lymph nodes so I’m not going for radiation or chemo,” she says. “I’m done with the medical stuff.” She insists she’s going to eat better, exercise more, take up yoga and meditation, and try to be as healthy as possible until she dies. She’s contemplating an artistic tattoo to obscure her now breastless chest.

That’s the rub. You can go through all the treatments and deal with all the side effects of them– sick as a dog and wanting to die most of the time. You maybe get a few good months and then it comes back with a vengeance and you die anyway. The outcome is the same. The difference is the quality of life in between.

This doesn’t have any thing to do with age. My friend is in her 60s, five years younger than I am. It can happen to us at any time in our lives. We have jobs to get to, children to raise, relationships to deal with, bills to pay, retirement to plan for, and then suddenly we have to make these decisions about what we want and don’t want because we are diagnosed with a serious illness or have a life-threatening accident.

I had a stage IV melanoma a while back. Had the Moh’s surgery, no problems, no lymph node involvement. That follow-up oncologist wanted to do radiation and possibly chemo, but I said no thanks. I’ve been in remission for almost 8 years. That doesn’t mean it won’t still come back. One or two spots I’d probably have them removed but that with a vengeance thing not so much. I’ll start planning for the end of my days.

I don’t have a problem with dying. I did that once. Drowned. It was a fantastic journey home and back again. I expect it to be the same the next time, only without the back again, so I look forward to moving on to what comes next… because I know there’s a next. Of course I’ll miss my family and friends but I know I’ll see them again soon.

My concern is more about what will happen to me while I’m still in a body. I refuse to put up with Alzheimer’s. Any inkling of that and I’m making my going away party plans before I forget how! I’ve filled out my Advance Healthcare Directive and appointed a non-family member as my healthcare representative so my children don’t have to make any decisions. They don’t want to talk about it so I sent them their copies and included a video of me telling them my decisions about what I want and don’t want. I’d opt for a heart attack over a prolonged illness, but if it were an illness, I’d be working on the paperwork process for physician aid-in-dying the moment I got that 6 months to live diagnosis then I’d keep working my Bucket List!

So how does one decide what they want at the end of their life? It has to be based on one’s own beliefs and values, not forced on you by someone else’s biases. Talk to your family, your doctor, your spiritual advisor, search your soul, search the Internet… meditate, pray, talk to God or a tree. Educate yourself about the process. There are some good videos out these days about death and dying– “Consider the Conversation,” “How to Die in Oregon,” “The Day I Died: The mind, the brain, and near-death experiences.” The more you know, the better decisions you can make about your own healthcare at the end of life.

April 16th is National Healthcare Decisions Day… think about it!

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What if death is… ?

Death is always a loss no matter how you look at it and it doesn’t mean there won’t be grief, but what if…?

  • What if dying is actually a wonderful, exciting experience as near-death experiencers have described?
  • What if dying is an opportunity to celebrate the end of a wonderful human experience and a joyous return to our spiritual home and family?
  • What if death is our graduation from the University of Life on Earth and we go on to have other amazing experiences exploring consciousness at higher levels, being co-creators with God?
  • What if all those who have transitioned before us are there to greet us, and those we leave behind join us again almost before we know it because there is no time?
  • What if we exist in a multi-dimensional universe in many different forms in many different frequencies of endless possibilities?
  • What if consciousness doesn’t arise from matter, but creates matter?
  • What if our True Nature is continuous and our human lifetimes are breathing spaces along our eternal journey?
  • What if our human lives are not completely predestined and we have the free will to choose to break the cycle of death and rebirth, and move into higher consciousness and higher dimensions?
  • What if we can accelerate our progress by practicing the art of conscious dying during each human lifetime we experience?
  • What if we make the spiritual connection in a human lifetime and go directly into the Light at transition, thereby propelling our soul into the next dimension?

How wonderful would that be?

• • • • • • •

Excepted from new book by Diane Goble

Stepping into the Light

Reframing death from a Near-Death Experience perspective

(due out in June 2014)